Why I Stopped Blogging
The Deeper Story Behind Why I Stepped Back—and Where I’m Heading Now.
My last posted article was on September 15. Three months ago.
The posts before that had already been sparse. After a couple years of consistent weekly writing, things had trickled off. There were reasons—many of which I can’t even remember now. I plan to get back to it. I miss it. But I also made a conscious decision to stop for a while.
In fact, today I’m breaking the rule I set for myself:
No blogging.
I may end up breaking it more often, but there is a reason I, a blogger, created the rule.
Recently someone asked me an important question:
If you died today and could somehow look back at your life, what would be the one thing you didn’t do that you’d regret?
I didn’t need more than ten seconds.
“I’d regret never publishing my book. It’s the one thing I want to do.”
That’s not a small confession. It hits me hard. I’m not sick or anything like that, but I’ll be 50 soon, and it’s safe to say I’m in the second half of my life. I feel the clock ticking.
There was another time when I felt something similar—when I realized something mattered more to me than anything else and I was running out of time:
Saving my marriage.
When I faced losing my wife, nothing mattered more.
Not.
One.
Thing.
So I acted accordingly. I put everything else aside. I made every other goal secondary to creating a strong marriage. I became willing to challenge my own beliefs about who I was and what marriage meant. Nothing mattered more than becoming the kind of person my wife wanted to be married to.
Almost two decades later, we’re still married. We’re happier than ever.
I did it. (Well, we did it. But you know what I mean.)
After admitting how important it is for me to write this book, I wondered if I could approach the project with that same level of commitment.
No other goal matters.
Of course, that isn’t entirely true. Being a good husband and father matters deeply. But publishing this book will help me do those things better. Writing is central to how I process and communicate ideas. It’s how I understand myself. It’s why I consider myself a writer.
But there’s a problem—one best stated by William Zinsser in his seminal work, On Writing Well:
“A writer will do anything to avoid the act of writing.”
People who don’t write often find that strange. Many of us who do write feel it in our bones.
And yet, millions of writers throughout history have overcome that tendency. That’s why we have books. So why haven’t I?
Well… sometimes writers avoid the hard work of writing by writing other things.
Blog posts, for instance.
To be fair to myself, creating this Substack was part of the book-writing process. When it comes time to publish, it will matter that I have some sort of audience—people willing to support the launch or interested enough to buy the book. There was a method to the blogging madness, even if the content drifted at times.
But still, plenty of people blog and publish books. It’s not impossible.
It just hasn’t worked for me. Blogging became a distraction from my main goal.
Distractions have always been an issue for me, long before smartphones and social media. Executive-function challenges have followed me my entire life.
In recent months—probably the same months when my posts petered out—I’ve been learning more about ADHD. I won’t go deep into my diagnosis here, though it’s tempting. (And yes, that’s very on-brand for ADHD.)
What I will say is this: I’m starting to understand that my lack of executive functioning isn’t just a matter of “I’m not good at it.” Sometimes I am. Other times I’m not. When it comes to achieving personal goals, I usually struggle.
But I’m working on it.
Right now, I simply don’t have the capacity to work on my book and blog consistently. I hope to get there one day, but today isn’t that day.
So I stopped blogging.
Mostly. I’ll allow myself to break the rule occasionally—like I did today.
So what does this mean for my Substack?
Right now, I’m not blogging regularly. And I genuinely miss it. I miss talking to you all and hearing from you. You’re my people, and I need you in my life.
I’ve set some timeline goals for myself. I’m not comfortable sharing them, because I have a history of not meeting them, but they’re there. My hope is that as I make progress on the book, I’ll eventually have more space to return to regular posts.
I’ll be back—hopefully on a consistent schedule.
But for now, my writing time goes to the book.
If you’re a paid subscriber, I’ve paused billing indefinitely. I’ll restart it only when I’m producing consistently again. And as a thank-you for your support, I plan to share some polished sections of the book from time to time. The writing has taken me places I didn’t expect, and I want to let you in on that.
See you soon.
…Maybe.
Signed copy please!
Sounds like you made the write... decisions.